A friend and I had to attend training classes for work the last couple of days. Today in between our classes, we went to have a quick bite to eat and to catch up on what was going on in our lives. We don’t get to see each other that often.
She needed a little time to vent and I am more than willing to just sit and listen when my friend needs me. Some times it puts things into perspective for me as well. As she was talking, I could feel how frustrated she was with work, kids, husband….the whole nine yards. Feeling like things were spinning out of control and no way to stop it. Those feelings of “I want to just get in the car and drive…never come back or atleast not for a couple of days.” She said she felt guilty for having these feelings but she was still having them just the same. We’ve all been there….trust me. I dreamt so much of just getting in the car and driving. No particular destination….just driving. Driving for the peace and quiet, for the solitude, no one expecting anything from you, needing you to do anything…just YOU and QUIET, SWEET PEACEFUL QUIET. She kept telling me “I just need to go somewhere quiet. That’s what I want for a few days.”
I believe she loves her family and is not going to run away, although she would probably like to at this moment. She is going to take her life back, if only for a few days. Going to rest and relax alone for those few precious days. Sounds wonderful, doesn’t it? I think it’s absolutely awesome that her husband is ok with her making some time for herself and ok that she is doing this alone. FYI…I want to go so bad, I can’t stand it. I LOVE the Carribean.
I write this today to let you know that you are NOT alone. We ALL get this way at some point and if someone tells that they don’t they are probably not being honest with you or themselves. We all can’t take a vacation but you can talk to a close friend and get those feelings out there and validated. Most important: Make time for yourself. If YOU don’t do it, no one will.
Just a few suggestions:
- Take time for yourself. Even if it’s just going down to Starbucks every other week for a coffee and sitting there by yourself. I love to people watch and Starbucks. I do this one myself.
- Lock the door and take a bubblebath. If you don’t have someone to watch the kiddos? See below and kid swap so you can take that wonderful bubblebath.
- If you don’t have a significant other, kid swap with a friend a time or two a month so each of you has atleast one day a month that you can go and have atleast an hour to do nothing for anyone but yourself. Back in the ’90’s my first husband was in the military and was deployed to Cuba. I did this one, ALOT. I would keep all the kids while she went out and had some time for herself, the next week she kept the kids and I went out for a while.
2 ex’s, 2 dogs and 3 kids later…..Total ramblings that are personal and sometimes even thought provoking